


What a shitty day

by Ciern



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen, He Just Wants His Family, I Love The Guardians They Need To Be Together, I'm Sorry, Not A Fix-It, Peter Does Nothing Wrong, Peter Quill Feels, Peter Quill Needs a Hug, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-06
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-05-03 03:18:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14559675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ciern/pseuds/Ciern
Summary: [ MAJOR INFINITY WAR SPOILERS ]He wants to see Gamora. He wants to kiss her, to dance one last time with her.He thinks about Rocket and Groot. He wants to be with them too.(five minutes left to live; Peter does nothing except thinking about the people he loves)





	What a shitty day

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so 
> 
> this is just a little thing about Peter and the Guardians because I love them and I saw some people on the internet mad at Peter because of what he did during the fight with Thanos; he just lost Gamora and wasn't able to see her one last time (and man, he was ready to kill her when they faced Thanos because she asked to and he knew it was the only solution; SO SCREW YOU HE IS INCREDIBLE) and now his girlfriend is gone, his team is in part and he had to watch Mantis and Drax turn in ashes before he died too. 
> 
> That's a lot to deal with. And i AM STILL NOT OKAY 
> 
> anyway enjoy (as much you can lmao) ! also, thanks to my beta (and girlfriend) for the help!

What a shitty day.

 

Peter never really saw himself as a hero. Sure, he and the others saved the galaxy maybe twice or three times already, but it was not really a big deal. It is not like he would mind if the thing was actually a big deal, hell it looks very cool on a curriculum, but no. Peter was a lot of things, but he was not stupid — no matter what Rocket would say. He was raised by Ravagers; he had been robbing stuff and breaking the law since he was eleven, he was definitely not a good guy.

 

Besides, a hero is supposed to save people. But Peter could not save his mother — okay, he was a kid and she had cancer (put in her head by that creepy father of him, but still). He could not save Yondu, his real father. The one who raised him, who taught him how to survive, how to be a man. Yondu was maybe an asshole, more than certainly, but after he had died, Peter realized he had been the father figure he always wanted. He had just not understood it until Yondu gave his life for him. Nobody did that for Peter Quill, ever.

Shit, he missed that smurf.

 

And then again, he had not been able to save Gamora. Gamora who was nothing but the woman he loved and with whom he wanted to spend the rest of his life, nothing important for sure.

He had not even been allowed to say goodbye and how much she meant to him. It was too late. Thanos took her away and now her body was lost somewhere within the galaxy, lonely and forsaken. And there was nothing Peter could do about it. He tried not to think about her, although he really wanted to, because it brought back so much pain and he did not want to cry in front of the magician and the father/son duo — ah, what an asshole, Peter is a better dad anyway, he’s raising a teenager and Groot is certainly most tough than the little spider boy, whatever he calls himself.

 

But, of course, he had to think about her — _Gamora_. At the worst ever moment possible. And Thanos, oh that son of a bitch, of course, he would say exactly what Peter did not want to hear. What was he supposed to do? Just accepted the fact that she was  _gone_? That he would never see her again and that the last memory of her is him, pointing his gun at her head while Gamora cries and said she loves him — screw this.

 

But it was too late.

And here they are now, a bunch of losers who lost the battle that could save the whole universe. But it is too late, and Thanos is probably on Earth and already stealing the last infinity stone and — Peter does not want to think of this.

 

He wants to see Gamora. He wants to kiss her, to dance one last time with her. He wants to listen to his music, in the comfort and the safety of the ship — their home. Groot would be there because although he is a teenager, he still loves listening to some old Earth classic with Peter. Mantis would probably ask why all the songs are about love, and then Drax would say something stupid and Rocket would scream in the back, but they would all laugh anyway.

 

Damn, he is going to miss them. So much.

 

He thinks about Rocket and Groot. He wants to be with them too. He hopes they are safe with the viking blondie — he does not love him, firstly because Gamora looked at him and was impressed, like hell? That stupid one-eye guy was too browny anyway, Peter had a comfortable stomach to sleep on and he smelled good, _him_. Moreover, because Rocket went with him and although Peter will never ever admit it, he is a little worried. They had no news since they left — okay, that was not so long ago, but when you are in the middle of the end of the universe, one hour can be very very long. It was unusual for Peter to spend a day without Rocket making jokes or arguing with him.

 

Something — someone takes his hand. Peter turns his head. Mantis. He looks at her, tries to smile and reassure her, but apparently, it is not a great success as she squeezes his hand tighter.

 

“Don't be scared, Peter. It's okay,” she said, and her voice is soft. 

 

She had not been with the team for a long time, but still, Peter felt a deep affection for her. Like a big brother for his naive little alien sister. Her antennas glow a little and Peter immediately feels better. As if all the pain — for Gamora — and the angst — for Rocket and Groot — in his heart was covered. It is still there, but as if a veil was put upon it.

 

He smiles again, and he can tell at the look in Mantis' eyes that is better. But his voice is cracking a little anyway when he answers: “Thanks.”

 

“Don't cry Quill, you're almost a man, like the pirate angel, don't ruin it. You will be a dude forever if you do,” said Drax suddenly, and Peter almost jumps out of scare. He had not heard him coming and it is still hard to understand how Drax could be so silent when he is so big.

 

“Damn it you ninja! Stop frightening me like this! And I _am_ a man, thank you.”

 

“Drax said I'm not a man either. He said I am like a baby because I know nothing and I cried too much. An ugly baby.” Mantis smiles as she talks, very proud apparently.

 

Peter glances at his friend ("Dude we talked about this, stop saying shit like this, you know she actually believes it's true and a good thing" "but it is true!"), but Drax, of course, is insensitive to this kind of things and just nods.

 

“But beautiful on the inside.”

 

A laugh comes from Peter. It is a little, sad laugh and it ends in a hoarse cough. But still, it's a laugh. Peter looks at his friends. _His family_. He wants to say he loves them — But then Drax looks at him, Mantis smiles and Peter knows he did not need to. They already know. His heart hurts. He does not want them to go. He does not want to leave them. He just found them, he does not want this life to end now, it is too soon.

 

_If there a god somewhere, any kind of god, and if I can just make one wish it would be to _wake up every morning with the five of them around me. And marry Gamora, yeah.__

 

But there is no God.

Or he just does not want to listen to him.

 

Mantis is gone in a blink, trying to say something, to warn them. Peter does not have the time to understand. She was there, right next to Drax, and then — gone. Peter's breath gets stuck in his throat. He turns to face Drax, who look at him, silently asking what is going one.

 

_No no no_

 

He tried to reach him, but it is too late. He follows the ashes, carried away by the wind. He notices that the magician one is gone too. He hears the kid, calling his father — well he calls him “Mr. Stark” but it is definitely his child, Peter could say because he himself looks at Groot the same way the asshole looks at the kid. Gamora pointed it once to make fun of him, but she was gently smiling at the same time. She is so beautiful when she smiles like this. When she looks at them like they are the best thing she has —

 

 _Shit_ , Groot. Rocket.

 

Peter turns around, taking a look over his shoulder. He has to find them. He has to be with them so they can go back aboard the ship and Mantis and Drax would probably be there too, and Drax would laugh at him like “Quill you are so stupid, it was a joke and you fell right into it” and then Gamora would be there too and she would smile and kiss him and-

 

Peter lowers his head. His body begins to disappear. His hands become ashes.

 

“Oh, man..”

 

And then, there is nothing left.

 

What a shitty day, really.

**Author's Note:**

> I just can't stop thinking about Rocket, alone on the Earth and who doesn't know yet he lost his all family. I'm such a mess. 
> 
> Thank you for reading btw, maybe I will write more about the Guardians because I need fluff and family domestic things with them after IW.


End file.
